When There’s No More Room In Hell, The Dead Will Walk The Earth

24 Oct

At first cock-crow the ghosts must go
Back to their quiet graves below.
~Theodosia Garrison

 Are you sitting comfortably, my dear? Let me tell you a story, of horror and fear….

I’m a bit of a wimp. My bedroom door is right by a door that leads downstairs, and if I go to the loo in the night I often run past the door to get back into bed, just in case the ghouls get me. As a five year old, I vividly remember being read a story by a school teacher about a monster that lived in the space created when a door was left open; the triangle between that and the wall, and now, as a twenty six year old woman, I still sleep with the door shut. Its habit, but I’m sure it has its roots in this. I hate to be able to see darker patches, it stops me from sleeping.

So this weekend, when my sister and I decided to go to the cinema we had a bit of a debate over the right film. I opted for Madagascar 3 (cartoons and penguins) but she preferred Paranormal Activity 4. You know the one, demons are let in, demons throw humans all over the place, humans in the cinema join together in terrified union, humans go home and have to sleep with the light on in case fictional tale of fear is somehow true… not my cup of tea. BUT, seeing as I am closer to thirty than twenty, I thought it was time to embrace my inner wimp and become at one with my demons (see what I did there) so I did it. I braved. To be honest, the film was rubbish and not at all scary, but I thought that about the first one. Until….

I went to Cyprus in September. On the first night I struggled to get to sleep; the heat, new environment and presence of my best friend was all alien to me, and it took a really long time to drift off. When I eventually did, I was woken by a crash that sounded like it was coming from the bathroom. I went to investigate.

Just in case you are trying to picture the scene, I wasn’t armed with anything, I was just lookin’. Not alarmed, nothing. It sounded like the noise when your shampoo gets knocked off the bath and scatters down into the tub, but when I got to the bathroom, there was nothing there. The noise was too loud to have come from an adjoining room, but despite being suitably freaked out, we went back to sleep. Pretty soon I heard the steady breathing of my friend, who had gone straight back to sleep with no concern. Could I? No, I could not.

 Because all I could think about was the bit in Paranormal Activity 1 where I had laughed. The goaty footprints. At the time, when the girl put the talc all over the floor and I joked that didn’t the devil have hooves and wasn’t this the perfect time to see goaty prints in the talc, I didn’t think it would come back to haunt me.

What-if-there-really-is-a-devil-and-its-portal-is-a-hotel-room-in-Cyprus? I panicked.

Eventually, I managed to calm myself enough to start drifting off, and just as I was about to fall asleep, I woke myself up screaming.

It had happened again.

Luckily, my best friend has the patience of a saint and managed to calm me down, but by this point I was freaking out, and ready to go sleep in the foyer of the hotel and get the first bus out to a church in the morning, to stand on some hallowed ground or whatever it is you are supposed to do when being haunted.

We finally found out what it was. The fridge had been making a horrendous humming noise, and to help me get to sleep, I had unplugged it. I left the door open to stop it from stinking our room out, not realising that it had a really small ice freezer in the top. Through the night, the ice was melting and large chunks were falling from the freezer onto the tile floors, causing the crashing noise.

Totally rational explanation.

Still slightly traumatised.

I’m looking forward to sharing some of the outfits from the Halloween party next week 🙂

Do you have any ridiculous stories that scared you at the time?


15 Responses to “When There’s No More Room In Hell, The Dead Will Walk The Earth”

  1. visitingmissouri October 24, 2012 at 3:34 pm #

    I never see horror movies. Even their trailers on television are enough to keep me awake for a week. Please let your sister know that I’m never going to the movies with her.

    • tinkerbelle86 October 24, 2012 at 4:16 pm #

      I’ll pass on the message love, but she was the one eeking and squealing through the film. I laugh in the face of Paranormal Activity…

  2. susielindau October 24, 2012 at 4:15 pm #

    Hahaha! We have real paranormal activity in our house. No melting cubes, just random banging. Whatever or whoever it is has run off the night visitors I was getting, so I guess it is a good trade off! I bet you can’t wait to come to Boulder now! 🙂

  3. prenin October 24, 2012 at 7:02 pm #

    When our neighbour, a Jehova’s witness lady, died she swore on her deathbed that she’d always look over us.

    Thereafter we had a shadow at the top of the stairs that had no light to cast it.

    I was subject to the usual violent beating by my dad and sent to bed with no tea (again) so I waited until everyone was asleep and sneaked downstairs for a sandwich.

    I was nude so I made no noise and when I came out of the kitchen a woman leaned over the stair rail and held out a hand to me.

    Thinking I’d been busted I turned on the light, but there was nobody there…

    Love and hugs!


  4. SprinklinThoughts October 24, 2012 at 11:18 pm #

    Whe I was a kid I saw The Exorcist… had such an effect on me that I still have a little trouble with green lights at night.
    You unplugged the fridge? Was it empty?
    …just wondering 🙂

    • tinkerbelle86 October 25, 2012 at 4:42 pm #

      No it was full, but of mini bar stuff like cans of cola and bottles of water, nothing that wouldnt last the night being a bit luke warm

  5. Marvin the Martian October 25, 2012 at 3:53 am #

    Ha, that’s a great story!

  6. Garrett McKenna October 25, 2012 at 8:48 am #

    2 things:

    1) Loved the opening quote from Theodosia Garrison
    2) I would have done this if I were you: watched Paranormal Activity 4, THEN Madagascar 3. I love horror movies, but I always need to, like, watch at least a half hour of a light cartoony thing to take my mind off of it afterwards!

    • tinkerbelle86 October 25, 2012 at 4:42 pm #

      i know, when I watch something scary on the TV I always have to follow it with a few episodes of Family Guy!

  7. Sam October 25, 2012 at 12:05 pm #

    I never watch horror movies for this very reason. I once got all the way through Gothika (that one with Halle Berry). For the next three nights I did not sleep.. I also screamed in the movie house, which is rather akward when the lights come on. I was still in High School when that movie came out and, of course, half the school decided to go watch it that evening.

    • tinkerbelle86 October 25, 2012 at 4:44 pm #

      I remember seeing that at the cinema, for a late showing. I drove home (was about 17) and there was no one in our house. I used to have to walk down the side of the house to let myself in the house… needless to say I slept with a chair in front of my bedroom door. For reals 🙂

      • Sam October 25, 2012 at 7:39 pm #

        Light on. Every time. I hate the scary stuff! Give me animated giggles dammit.

  8. misswhiplash October 25, 2012 at 1:25 pm #

    if there is good there must be bad, but don’t get into a tizz-wozz over it….
    I always remember this that I was told many years ago.

    Fear knocked at the door
    Faith opened it
    There was no one there…….have Faith

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