Some Of You Will Be Baffled, I Can Guarantee It

1 Aug

The word sport, in my book (it’s a dictionary) is considered a swear word. I am the fastest runner in the opposite direction to the gym, and a gold medallist in being first to the pub after work, but any actual organised sport makes me shudder. I don’t like anything that I have to do in a team, because I don’t want to disappoint the rest of the crew by dropping the bat or not hitting the ball, and when forced to take part in tennis on the Kinect in the office during the Olympics, even the automated commentary speculated on how bad ‘player 2’ was. That’s me folks!

So I wasn’t excited about the Olympics. I adopted a traditional British approach. Whinging about the sheer amount of tourists that would descend on the capital and hamper my journey to work , and bemoaning that food prices had soared to capitalise on hungry foreigners.

When a tourist coughs on the Tube and doesn’t put their hand over their mouth

But then I watched the Olympic ceremony with my American cousins, and a patriotic sports fan emerged like a butterfly from a chrysalis, having transformed from that grumpy caterpillar. I did find it a little odd (Beijing had thousands of drummers, we had sheep, some beds that lit up and at one point, E.T) but how awesome was it?! I felt proud to be eccentrically British, despite the rain and the cold, and embrace my tea drinking, jolly good fellow heritage. Although I know none of you ‘got’ Dizzee Rascal, but that’s OK.

And now? Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a clue about the rules of any of these sports that I’m watching, but I kept one eye on the Equestrian events while at work yesterday, and my heart was in my mouth as I watched the men’s synchronised diving, and slightly teary as they scored a fourth.

When Mitt Romney starts bitching about London.

I clapped and cheered when we got our first gold today, and thought how fantastic Hampton Court looked as we grabbed our second. Now I’m sitting watching the men’s gymnastics, and I gather the point of this one is to stay on the horse as long as possible, do a handstand and then jump off without falling face first into the sand. And look at those arms!!

In the words of Boris Johnson,”The excitement is growing so much I think the Geiger counter of Olympo-mania is going to go ‘zoink’ off the scale.”

Who’d have thought, I’m a sports fan after all!?

What’s your favourite Olympic sport?


13 Responses to “Some Of You Will Be Baffled, I Can Guarantee It”

  1. I'd Rather Be In Iceland August 1, 2012 at 5:15 pm #

    I can pretty much echo all your sentiments. I don’t want it to end now! Favourite sport = handball!

  2. visitingmissouri August 1, 2012 at 6:15 pm #

    My favorite sport is rowing, as you can get the excitement in any game. I’ll watch everything though (if I’m not busy having a life).

  3. prenin August 1, 2012 at 6:21 pm #

    Hmmm… I have a Gold medal in sleeping… 🙂

    Love and hugs!


  4. observingthescene August 1, 2012 at 8:47 pm #

    My favorite Olympic sport is the last one before they adjourn the proceedings so we can get back to sanity. Oh, I truly admire the athletic abilities of the participants, but I’m less than thrilled with the amount of attention the whole event brings. Millions of dollars expended to build venues, and for travel and subsistence of these folks that wish to show off their skills in front of the world. I’d prefer to watch old cowboy movies. I’m most pleased with the Olympics when they are in my rear-view mirror!

  5. sn2snblog August 2, 2012 at 1:27 am #

    Favourite has to be gymnastics…. Slight bit of a perve over here haha.

  6. Victoria-writes August 2, 2012 at 8:44 am #

    I’ve been the same! Go team GB!

  7. Sam August 4, 2012 at 8:06 pm #

    Obviously I love the equestrian events. Must be honest though I love the Olympics in general. I spend every spare moment glued in front of the television happy to watch anything and everything. It’s all so dramatic: the best of the best fighting it out for medals, heart break and tears on the podium! Nothing like it.

  8. Richard Wiseman August 7, 2012 at 8:37 pm #

    I don’t like sport.Sorry too many violent and aggressive PE teachers in my day.I do an hour’s exercise every day and that’s it. As for the Olympics I’m not massively keen. Very proud to be English though, mostly because of the literature.

  9. Go Jules Go August 8, 2012 at 3:01 am #

    Oh man. I’ve never wanted to be British more than I do right now, and THAT is saying something. I don’t really care for much beyond the opening ceremonies, but I suppose figure skating and gymnastics are my favorite to watch!

  10. A Gracious Life August 8, 2012 at 12:01 pm #

    Taking up a sport isn’t a possibility in my life too but watching it? I enjoy that. My fave sport in the olympics –soccer, basketball and tennis. Hurray for Murray! Nice visiting here. Lots of cheer going on.

  11. aparnauteur August 9, 2012 at 4:35 pm #

    Nicely done! I am pretty much a sports philistine myself. My favorite olympic sport belongs to the winter olympics genre: Curling. I find the dynamics of curling the most easy on my uncomplicated brain.

  12. abichica August 12, 2012 at 10:13 am #

    hahaha.. love your post, its really funny and intelligently written.. 🙂

  13. Marvin the Martian August 18, 2012 at 4:52 am #

    Now that all the shouting’s over, I can sincerely say that I am sick unto death of women’s volleyball. I’m fairly certain that’s the only thing that was playing, every time I turned on the TV. Now I dearly loathe the sport and I want to see it banned. Along with badminton. And that thing Euroweenies call “handball,” which obviously is NOT handball, but is an unholy crossbreed of volleyball and soccer.

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