Fake It To Make It

13 Feb

I know what you are all thinking. “That girl is such a natural beauty”. You weren’t? What gives? All us girls know that to leave the house looking like this would be social suicide. But why?  Coco the Clown isn’t bang on trend for spring summer 2012? Jeeeeeeez.

We are all guilty of a little fakery. Whether you wear that uber bra that makes you look four cup sizes bigger, meticulously stick on fake lashes before you go out for the night or stain your bed sheets orange trying to get that perfect sunkissed look, it’s all the same.

But the interesting point is the difference between what us girls think is too much and what the men folk around us deem to be unacceptable. My first boyfriend once informed me that he hated it when I wore makeup, yet hadn’t even noticed my existence at college until I lost the glasses in favour of contacts, and put a bit of makeup on. Funny that.

I love a fake eyelash or two and I fake tan in the winter months to stop people mistaking me for Casper the Friendly Ghost. A tan really makes you feel your best, and as I don’t live in a country where we see the sun on more than a monthly basis, fake tan is the only way (believe me, I am working on my living situation…) The idea of possible skin cancer on a sunbed counts that one out for me, so slathering myself in creosote coloured lotion is the only way, and I go through fits and starts as to whether I wish to be a bronzed goddess or pale and interesting.

I wear makeup as not to scare small children, and sometimes I dye my hair, but as April will tell you, not often enough. (When will you notice those roots??!!!) So where do we draw the line? A friend of mine rushed out and purchased the new La Senza boob enhancing bra, but after a few weeks she cast it aside in favour of her trusty old bras. When questioned on this point she admitted to feeling bad, as when she met guys she felt that she was false advertising the size of her boobs. Which made me laugh. Men I have dated have marveled at the difference when one of my old housemates wore her fake hair and didn’t, citing it to be false advertising to new boys on the block, and my Dad often looks at me with incredulous wonder when I am at the fake tan stage where I look like I have been down a mine, and simply asks “Why?”.

The boy perspective is often amusing to us girls who are so used to the rituals of layering on lotions and potions, colours and scents to make us feel our best. First boyfriend could smell fake tan a mile off and often accused me of smelling like ‘a digestive’. I have laughed with friends about the ritual of dying the bed sheets orange, or disasters where you wake up and realise you fell asleep without washing your hands and now have palms the colour of terracotta. I love fake lashes, makeup and hair dye but I draw the line at actually clipping someone else’s discarded hair into my own, while other girls see nothing wrong with tinting their eyebrows, bleaching their bum holes and rocking a head of hair that once belonged to someone else.

I think for me the real answer is that it is simply too much bother. I don’t mind myself too much without all the additions, so I can’t be arsed to get up three hours early just to make myself look like someone else.

But I want your opinion! Girls, what are you prepared to do to look good, and what is a waste of time? And men, what are your thoughts on the multi million pound industry that is fakery?

What do you think? What counts as enhancement, and what counts as false advertising?

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19 Responses to “Fake It To Make It”

  1. Kats Whispers February 13, 2012 at 1:35 pm #

    Personally I am of the little effort brigade. I’ve never dyed my hair (although I’m sure I tried that wash and go tint stuff they sold in the 90’s – horrible), I look pretty odd with fake tan and my make up is minimal.

    But I would never tell a woman who prefers to go out in full fake tan, lashes and the rest to tone it down. For some it is a kind of armour against the world and if it allows them to feel confident then brilliant.

    If you find yourself changing how you look purely for someone else however then that is a problem. No-one should feel forced to look a certain way. Each to their own x

  2. observingthescene February 13, 2012 at 1:35 pm #

    I can see the point of both philosophies, but speaking as a man who just celebrated his fifty first wedding anniversary, who was also a career sailor, I believe it all depends on what you’re trolling for. If you’re looking for Mr. Right, then something approaching the natural and truthful is the best way to go. If, on the other hand, you’re looking for Mr. Right Now, then perhaps spectacular will get you the most noticeable results. As a single sailor, my immediate reaction to the latter was, “how long will it take?” My reaction to the former was, “This is the type you take home to introduce to your family.” And, believe me, I walked away from more than one of the more natural ones, not because she wasn’t attractive, but because I thought she was too nice for someone on a mission like mine. As I said, it depends on what you’re trolling for.

  3. observingthescene February 13, 2012 at 1:36 pm #

    What I said before.

  4. susielindau February 13, 2012 at 2:16 pm #

    Check out this video! You have probably already seen it, but it is hilarious. I just posted it this weekend on Facebook. I think you are beautiful!

    • tinkerbelle86 February 13, 2012 at 3:49 pm #

      I have seen it, its great! I just wanted to point out im not doing market reasearch on what I should do to myself, just interested in finding out peoples thoughts! 🙂

  5. madakanto February 13, 2012 at 2:19 pm #

    Well, I´m lucky boing naturally tanned coming from en exotic country. the last time I had make-up was at my wedding and it didn´t feel right. It wasn´t me and I´ve been max 10 times at a hairdresser´s, but I´m always disapointed. I just don´t trus them. They don´t know how to deal with my hair.

    I totally understand why you “fake ” sometimes. If it makes you feel good and confident, it´s fine.

  6. Richard Wiseman February 13, 2012 at 2:26 pm #

    I’m not fooled, nor have I ever been fooled by ‘fakery’. I do not, however, judge a woman on the level of ‘fakery’. Women should do what they want to do and do what makes them feel good. There is too much judgement of women based on their looks and this puts enormous pressure on women. My wife never wears high heels, because she finds them impractical and she wears a little make up, but to my mind does not need it. My wife dyes her hair regularly and has her routines, but is not overly concerned with being ‘perfect’. This in a sense fits in with my view. I think that both men and women should make an effort to be clean and presentable, but should also learn to be both happy with themselves and unwilling to be bullied by the media into feeling inadequate. If I’m asked about which ‘celebrity/ film star/ pop star I most fancy my reply is in all honesty I wouldn’t know as they way they look on television, film, in the public eye & in photographs isn’t the way the look in real life and if I were to genuinely fancy one of them I’d have to talk to them for a bit to find out if they were intelligent or not, because regardless of ‘physical fakery’ one cannot fake intelligence and my personal turn off is stupidity. I suspect that there is nothing more unattractive in a man or a woman as ignorance and lack of intelligence. People might think that a body beautiful with no brain is attractive, but try that out in a relationship for a year and see how bored you get! It doesn’t matter how much ‘fakery’ a woman engages in as long as it makes her happy and the reverse is true.
    If you want an opinion from an old married man I’d personally say that what the majority of men seek in a woman has nothing to do with looks and all to do with whether or not they will be able to relax around a woman. If a man finds a woman who makes him feel able to ‘be himself’ at all times of the day then he will be happy and move mountains to make her happy in return.

  7. prenin February 13, 2012 at 2:37 pm #

    Hi hun! 🙂

    Good to know you feel confident only if you are slathered in beauty aids – did anyone tell you that you are a truly beautiful person with the face of an angel???

    NO?

    Consider yourself told!!! 🙂

    As for the sale of beautifying items?

    Have you noticed that they are now selling them to MEN???

    I use soap, medicated shampoo, antiperspirant and Gucci Envy (which mum bought me) on special occasions like Church, but only because it has become acceptable and not assumed to be a sign that you are Gay and therefor deserving of a beating by REAL men who seldom avail themselves of anything more than coal tar soap and water…

    Our view of ourselves has become a salable commodity and we are being bombarded constantly with images of what it is to be a REAL man, or SEXUALLY ATTRACTIVE woman so long as you buy their products.

    I dread what will happen to the next generation…

    Love and hugs my Angelic friend! 🙂

    Prenin.

  8. nelle February 13, 2012 at 3:12 pm #

    I use makeup perhaps a half dozen times a year, and then a minimal amount. That doesn’t mean I’m adverse to personal appearance, although as a dyke care not what guys think.

    Men enhance their appearance, at least some do, and all enhance their persona. We humans like to show the best of us.

  9. Janie Jones February 13, 2012 at 4:42 pm #

    Periodically I have done the make up thing. I like the look of some now and then when done conservatively, but I have very oily skin so within an hour or so of application it begins to melt and look worse than none and needs to be washed off &/or reapplied. I’ve been told that if I bought higher quality cosmetics I wouldn’t have this problem, or if I used this skin toner or that cleansing system, but have other things I’d rather spend my money on. Besides, I don’t like lipstick rings on my cups and travel mugs. I also don’t like the smudge of make up on my coat or shirt collars, on my man or his shirt, or my pillowcases when I forget to wash my face before bed. All in all, make up in my book seems to much expense and work for too little in exchange.

  10. artjen1971 February 13, 2012 at 5:21 pm #

    Funny! I feel more and more like a fraud with each passing day that I apply makeup to cover up age spots and fatigue–it used to simply enhance, now it’s like airbrushing a size 12 to a size 2. Oh well–too many years, into deep to try the whole granola look–natural beauty definitely becomes me through series of bottles, compacts, tubes and wands.

  11. visitingmissouri February 13, 2012 at 6:16 pm #

    If I can see the difference between neck (and hands, arms etc.) and face, I don’t like it. Otherwise, I have learned to appreciate it.

  12. teeceecounsel February 13, 2012 at 8:58 pm #

    Unique and sweet! Love it when things are natural!

  13. Meg@thelegaltart February 13, 2012 at 9:21 pm #

    I am a make up everyday girl, although I am trying to do without on weekends. I definitely feel more confident with it. But I laugh when men tell me they didn’t realise I wear make up. Yeah sweet heart I wake up like this! As for fake tan, you can smell it a mile off. I am very pale and prefer to keep it that way. Too much fuss maintaining a tan I wasn’t born with.

  14. Sandra Bell Kirchman February 14, 2012 at 7:09 am #

    I am sitting here with my mouth open after reading your post. The shock is in some of the “beauty aids” that I have never heard of…like dying the sheets orange? What’s that supposed to do again? And bleaching your bum hole??!! That one has me gasping.

    I’m not a prude by any means. I have used tan in a can a number of times in a desperate attempt to lose the dead fish belly-white that my post winter skin acquires. I end up streaked orange and brown, instantly advertising that I either didn’t shake the spray can enough or the fake tan doesn’t “take” correctly on my skin.

    My hair has been dyed so many times for so long that no one, including me, remembers what it’s original color is. Worse, no one knows what color it is under all that tinting. My private guess is that it is stark grey, but we won’t go there.

    But some of the remedies of today’s young females leave me shaking my head. I would say those are too much.

    I prefer minimal make up – I used to go with a little bit of eye-liner, and some lipstick. It’s interesting to note that proper young ladies in the 1800s (and probably earlier) didn’t wear make-up at all. They pinched their cheeks and bit their lips to get some color in their faces. Only “hussies” wore makeup. How the mores have changed.

    I do enjoy the look of a well made up woman though. I definitely believe that good makeup expertly applied enhances natural beauty. Then, of course, some people need enhancing and some don’t.

  15. philosophermouseofthehedge February 14, 2012 at 10:57 pm #

    Who knows. One day this OK – one day that. Anyway Happy Bloggentines Day

  16. The Oasis Projekt February 15, 2012 at 5:25 am #

    Tink,

    Great post, especially right at Valentine’s Day! 🙂

    As a man, and a man that is involved in an industry where looking ‘good’ is important in one way or another (photography), I walk the line between situational looks and necessary looks. Situationally, there may be times where you want to wear that bra, or cake your face with a kilo of powder and gunk. Necessary looks…that’s where my heart lies. I like natural, not overdone, not overworked. I hear the arguments, “You WANT me to be 30 minutes late, TRUST me, you don’t want to go out with me tonight without my make-up on!” But in all truthfulness, that just tells me they don’t know me very well. I really do appreciate a TRULY natural look, not the make-up industries standard for “natural.”

    As a brother to two wonderful sisters and an uncle to three amazing nieces, I’m sensitive to what women feel they have to do to “improve” or “enhance” themselves. I’m very sure the world would continue spinning if Revlon, Maybelline, MAC, etc., suddenly disappeared. 🙂

    Again, Tink, you bring up AWESOME posts. 🙂

    Dug
    http://tr4f.wordpress.com

  17. duncanr February 17, 2012 at 2:56 pm #

    There’s a difference between ‘glamorous’ and ‘sexy’

    Make-up can make a woman look glamorous but it doesn’t follow that men will find her sexy. I can appreciate a woman who is all glammed up and smartly dressed but a woman with little or no make up, wearing casual clothes, and with tousled hair falling over her face is much more sexy to me!

    Too much make-up allied with ‘smart’clothes can create a psychological barrier – sending a sublimal message that the woman is not approachable – does not want close physical contact lest her immaculately groomed hair or clothes get messed up?

    Causal clothes, on the other hand, and a more natural look , creates the impression of a more friendly approachable woman who isn’t going to ward off an attempt to hug or cuddle her

    Of course that might just be me. Other men may think differently?

  18. veggieburgerblogger February 20, 2012 at 6:45 am #

    I think the problem is when women do these things to themselves for the approval of men, or at least only with the hopes of gaining male attention. If a woman honestly feels good layering on whatever, I don’t think it matters. Men don’t really get to have an opinion when they don’t feel that sort of pressure. I’d love to say that we should all just go au naturale, but that’s unrealistic. And I don’t think it’s false advertising if it makes someone feel good.

    On the personal side: at the moment, I feel best with a bit of concealer, liner on my lids and mascara since my lashes are blonde. I’ve been dyeing my hair a natural-looking blonde the past few months, and I straighten it. But I’ve worn my share of fake hair, wild makeup, gone tanning, etc. It changes with my mood, but I definitely don’t look back and think I was false advertising. Just being myself at the time.

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