You Are Here

23 Oct

You Are Here.

But where precisely is that? I mean in the grand scheme of things, where abouts is ‘here’ in relation to all the other experiences you will feel?

‘Here’ right now for me is sitting on the sofa in the flat I share with my best friend. We have been part of each other’s ‘here’ for over a decade, and I hope to be part of her ‘here and now’ till we are old and grey with those terrible cardigans that old ladies wear. ‘Here’ is quiet and peaceful, clean and organised, and I feel happy here.

But where was ‘here’ twelve months ago? ‘Here’ was unsettled at the loss of my home and the horrible split with ex-boyfriend, of being accused of ruining someone’s life by protecting my own, and of feeling like I was right back at the beginning again, somewhere I never imagined I would be.

But I feel I have come along way since ‘here’ eight years ago. ‘Here’ was a place of uncertainty; being diagnosed with a chronic illness, being frail enough that I was constantly tired and out of breath, and being scared to go back to the life I knew before the hospital. The tears, the fear and the large expanse of life before me. Pretty soon I will have spent longer with my illness than I did ‘well’, and I never thought that was possible when I stood in that ‘here’ all that time ago.

So what ‘here’ is around the corner? Where will my ‘here’ be in six months or a year, and who will still be standing in my ‘here’ as they once stood in my ‘there and then’?

When we were in Palm Springs, me and my cousin, Thing Two, went for a walk to find somewhere for us all to eat that night. He had a map in his hand which was a good thing as we got confused by all the clipped grass and artificial trees looking the same in the dark, and rows and rows of hotel room doors, indistinguishable from the next. We looked at the map and he said “Where’s the ‘You Are Here?” I laughed, reminding him that You Are Here only exists on the large static maps that are in shopping centres and such, because as you are moving with a handheld map you are changing the ‘You Are Here. He smiled at me and said “Surely the ‘You Are Here is where your heart is?” Right at that moment, my ‘You Are Here came flooding from wherever it was hiding and joined us on that spot in the inky darkness.

Once in a blue moon, my cousin is the wisest kid I know.

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21 Responses to “You Are Here”

  1. Thevoiceofthefan October 23, 2011 at 10:27 am #

    Thank you for this.

  2. chris zombieking October 23, 2011 at 11:06 am #

    what a fantastic way of looking at life.

    also, something you wrote has helped shed a little light on one of the experiences in my life. thanks for that! x

  3. prenin October 23, 2011 at 11:25 am #

    I like the idea of ‘Thing Two’, I used to read Doctor Seuss stories to one of the kids I looked after and he loved the stories! 🙂

    Love and hugs Thing One!

    Prenin.

  4. sandylikeabeach October 23, 2011 at 12:25 pm #

    What a lovely post. You took such a simple concept and wove insight, nuance and emotion around it and through it. One of your best posts!

  5. LittleMissVix October 23, 2011 at 1:09 pm #

    Amen to this! Woo!

  6. Megan October 23, 2011 at 1:27 pm #

    Love this post chica! “Here” is where I am and never know where that “here” will lead.

  7. rickythewiz October 23, 2011 at 1:44 pm #

    Amen to that! Yeah, I think we’ve all had that ‘You Are Here’ thing, but I’ve never heard it or read it as well expressed and as beautifully poignant as the way you write about it in the blog above. Not 5* stars Tink, but 10* for that post. As always a pleasure to read and a privilege to share your thoughts, but especially so this time. God bless.

  8. rumpydog October 23, 2011 at 2:30 pm #

    I like being here. And I like being able to share “here” with new friends like you!

  9. Redneckprincess October 23, 2011 at 5:09 pm #

    So perfect of a post right now, thanks Tink 🙂

  10. philosophermouseofthehedge October 23, 2011 at 5:47 pm #

    hard for humans to just be here. great post

  11. gojulesgo October 23, 2011 at 9:39 pm #

    I love this. And I’m so glad you are HERE!

  12. Kari @ bite-sized thoughts October 24, 2011 at 5:27 am #

    Lovely post 🙂 ‘Here’ can sometimes change without an hour, but at the end of the day I think the old saying is true – wherever you go, there you are.

  13. Julia (AKA Jules) October 24, 2011 at 8:42 am #

    what a great post. I totally agree, I want “here” to be in Scotland before their so-called independence. Ach, I gotta get a move on….!!
    Jules

  14. Sandra Bell Kirchman October 24, 2011 at 5:28 pm #

    Wonderful, healing post. Thanks.

  15. thf2 October 24, 2011 at 6:54 pm #

    Beautiful post! I always enjoy reading your words…what a gift you are!

    Dug
    http://thf2.wordpress.com

  16. Bam's Kitchen October 26, 2011 at 10:47 am #

    Great words from a great lady!

  17. El Guapo October 26, 2011 at 8:30 pm #

    As we used to say in college, Wherever you are, you’re there”.
    Of course, we used to drink an awful lot in college too…

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