My Mother Has Facebook. So Does My Grannie

21 Oct

Facebook was originally started as a university network; something that could keep everyone in touch. And then it exploded and bits of wall and status went everywhere, and now there is simply nothing that can be done about it. It will take over the world. They say that if Facebook was a country it would be the third biggest in the world, which I find a bit worrying. Sort of like when first boyfriend informed me that if ants were the size of humans they would dominate and be far superior, and we would be their slaves. You know, not something I will lose sleep over, but something that makes me uncomfortable all the same.

I was one of the later adopters of the service. I didn’t go to university so was contently living in my own little bubble where horrendous photos couldn’t be put up and tagged without me realising for days, or someone couldn’t invite me to their birthday/leaving drinks/coming out party without having to pick up the phone and call me. My friends hated it. One day one of them pinned me down and signed me up, and it’s been an addiction ever since.

But what is Facebook doing for our health? Not good things for the most of us, I imagine. Remember the days where you could part company with your other half and be blissfully unaware of their movements, presuming them dead? Not any more thanks to Mr Zuckerburg. And when you didn’t get reprimanded for not uploading your precious holiday photos IMMEDIATELY by your family? Aaah, those were the days.

I long for the days where I could go out drinking with my friends, and if someone took a photo the worst that could happen was that it appear in an album somewhere, and was laughed over for years to come. Now everyone you or the person with the camera has ever met will be able to see exactly why you hate that picture. For example, the Halloween where my friend accidently stood on my bare foot in stilettos. I fell to the floor in agony, and a photo appeared two days later on Facebook of a clear view of my pants, while my friend pointed and laughed. Funny photo for me and my friends. Not suitable for possible employers.

It has become a lynchpin in our lives. I often hop on the train and rather than grab a book, log into my Facebook from my iPhone and find out what that girl I haven’t seen in a decade is doing with her weekend or that old maths teacher is now a lesbian living on a commune somewhere in Israel. And what the hell is the deal with ‘poking’? Someone pokes you and despite you not having a clue what that is, politeness means that we do it back. After all, we don’t want to offend and leave that person pokeless.

So in summary I hate…. Oh god sorry, I got distracted updating my status. It seems that the love/hate cycle is endless and Facebook will continue to reign superior over the masses for a long while to come.

*Incidentally, the title is not a joke.

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25 Responses to “My Mother Has Facebook. So Does My Grannie”

  1. An Observant Mind October 21, 2011 at 8:01 am #

    I’m with you, I was an early adopter and became addicted almost immediately, now I use social media to help businesses keep up with the times – how did I get here?!? My grannie doesn’t have a computer, or a mobile phone or even a car, but my husbands 93-year-old grandma has facebook, and uses it! It makes me so happy to see someone so willing to be open-minded and flow with the times, I just hope Im like her one day! Great post x

  2. Julia (AKA Jules) October 21, 2011 at 8:40 am #

    ohmygod. I hate Facebook. I was on it for 3 and a bit years. All of those constant facebook-stalking moments plus people weren’t really contacting me on there, all proved a bit too much for me. It sucks. Facebook is dead in my world.

    Jules
    http://wordshakermag.wordpress.com / http://andsuddenlyisee.wordpress.com

  3. prenin October 21, 2011 at 10:31 am #

    I was harassed into going on faeces book and their cavalier attitude to rewriting the script to suit them has left me far from happy, but when Gina conned me into going on Miniplanet I was suddenly doomed…

    Now it is part of my morning routine to fire up my PC and check my emails and posts before checking who has posted what on facebook and then play on Miniplanet and Puzzled Hearts.

    It has all, so I say, become part of my life despite myself…

    Sorry you got stilettoed in your bare foot – I’m still suffering sympathy pains!!! (Ow! Ow! Ow!!!)

    Love and squishy hugs! 🙂

    Prenin.

  4. LittleMissVix October 21, 2011 at 10:31 am #

    I admit I don’t go on that often anymore for these reasons, I’m glad it came out after I left Uni so I have less drunken photos on there 🙂 I think it may be over in the next few years!

  5. Kari @ bite-sized thoughts October 21, 2011 at 10:44 am #

    I’m with you on this…and my mother and one of my grandmothers have profiles too! The problem is that I do miss things if I don’t go on, and I have a nosy streak that likes to see photos of others even whilst I don’t want others to see photos of me… 😛

  6. ceciliag October 21, 2011 at 11:23 am #

    My children MADE me join facebook so that they did not have to keep emailing to keep me up to date! Will it implode next i wonder? c

  7. gojulesgo October 21, 2011 at 12:29 pm #

    Oh, I’m with you on this! I love it for certain things, but HATE that people expect you to keep up with every detail of their life because they’ve put it on Facebook. And there have definitely been some pictures I’ve ‘untagged’ of myself, LOL Oh and yeah, what is with the poking? It’s kind of creepy.

  8. sparklebumps October 21, 2011 at 1:08 pm #

    What irritates me is that everyone adds you as a friends and then when you try to chat with them, they go offline. What’s the frickin’ point?!

  9. kayjai October 21, 2011 at 1:34 pm #

    I am a late joiner to Facebook and my teenaged daughters won’t friend me. I’m thinking that’s actually a good thing. I don’t want to see their pictures of what they were doing when they told me they were sleeping over at a girlfriend’s house. They need their space with their friends….and, I just don’t want to know…

  10. susielindau October 21, 2011 at 3:11 pm #

    My daughter tagged me in some photos from our vacation where my hair looked horrible. I just finally deleted them. Facebook takes stalking and TMI to a whole new level!!

  11. jsh0608 October 21, 2011 at 5:01 pm #

    I love Facebook, but not as much as I did before. It is a great way to do a mass post so everyone who gets on will know what is going on, the rest I have to call and most of them don’t even answer the phone anyways. I’m with sparklebumps, why try to chat if they log off, although to some defense, your phone shows you online, when you are really not online. (this happens to me all the time) That poking thing is pretty annoying. I use to play most of the games, but since I have started school I have decided to delete and block the games (that took my time away), till further notice of course. The pictures, yes that can be cruel. And you are right susielindau – facebook does really take stalking and TMI to a who new level…especially with the new privacy settings, that I can not seem to fix for the life of me.

  12. Teenage Saint October 21, 2011 at 6:09 pm #

    Facebook has literally pushed me into depression.
    I too was a late entrant to the Fb world (Jan, this year). Initially it was fun watching my friend list grow and sneaking through all that pictures uploaded pictures.

    In my pre-Facebook days, it was just my life that I got to compare with. But now I am virtually made to compare my life with all the other 300+ people that I’m FB friends with. Watching at their happy statuses and pics makes me jealous because I was not invited to the other-day party or I didn’t go for a vacation this time or that I can’t make funny faces like them which if clicked can make it through the latest fb standards. It makes me angry :\

    But can’t help it ‘coz I AM ADDICTED!!! 😦

  13. AG October 21, 2011 at 7:43 pm #

    Hahahah you are so funny! I definitely agree. This was such a well written article, one of the best I have read in a looong time. Definitely made my day brighter – totally just made that my facebook status, yo.

  14. barb19 October 21, 2011 at 8:44 pm #

    You are dead right about Facebook but it’s hard to break away from it because everyone (or nearly everyone), uses it! I am a grandma and I use it to keep in touch with family – it’s the best way to keep in touch I’ve found out!
    Love it or hate it, it will be around for a long time.
    Excellent post Tink.

  15. therealsharon October 21, 2011 at 9:27 pm #

    It definitely is a love/hate relationship and so weird that my mom has a Facebook…my grandma doesn’t because she doesn’t have a computer but my husband’s grandma does!

  16. thewaiting October 21, 2011 at 10:15 pm #

    Ugh, I don’t mind too much that my mom and mother-in-law are both on FB and friends with me. But now that they’re FB friends, my mom always wants to gossip to me about what my in-law (who I get along with well) puts on her page. I thought I dodged a bullet when I married a man whose mother I meshed well with, but no such luck. Thank you, Facebook and social networking, for making it possible for two women to learn new reasons to resent each other and feel compelled to bring it to me. :/

  17. Redneckprincess October 22, 2011 at 4:26 am #

    It is a scary thing isn’t it…here is what I posted about this morning…

    http://www.theredneckprincess.net/2011/10/21/time-to-clean-out-the-skeletons/

  18. Sandra Bell Kirchman October 22, 2011 at 8:01 pm #

    I had FB for two years before I did anything with it. Had no idea what to do or how to move around it.

    I have mostly only accepted (or invited) people I know well, so I don’t seem to have most of the problems you have described. The one I do have is annoying to no end…the one where they put it on FB and expect you to know all about their lives. “Well, I put it on FACEbook. Didn’t you read it???” grrrr

    The other thing I find annoying, which you didn’t mention, is all the requests I get to play Farmville or Mafiaville or Birdville or all the other stupid games that I have no time for. I’ve tried politely thanking the requesters to desist, to no avail. I think they are finally getting the message though (after four years!), since I have had few invitations recently.

    Good post, Belle, and very timely.

  19. Domestic Goddess in Training October 23, 2011 at 1:41 am #

    Pretty much most of my family has FB now, including my in-laws. It makes it hard to post statuses that are not G-rated and really it prevents me from complaining… too much.
    BTW, I don’t get the whole poking thing either. Seems useless to me. Except for the sad jokes about poking someone’s mother, it does not seem to have a purpose.

  20. royal caribbean baltimore October 27, 2011 at 12:53 am #

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