Destination Unknown

24 Aug

How do you feel about airports? As much as I hate to fly, I love an airport. I like poking round the duty free shops and marvelling at all the offers (you can normally find me rubbing Clarins lotions and potions in to the back of my hand, or freaking out at MAC; old habits die hard!) and I love watching the planes taking off and playing the games of guessing where people are going.

But I haven’t had smooth rides in these places. When I was a lot younger the fear of flying would make me throw up, so much so that when leaving Toronto I puked while doing rock climbing the morning we flew…. awkward.

But the experience that scarred me for life was when I was about thirteen, and on one of my many trips to Portugal. I was wearing a halter neck summer top, and therefore couldn’t wear a bra (please note men, this isn’t for any sort of medical reason or anything remotely important, it’s a strap related issue. Serious times) At thirteen you don’t often actually need a bra, but the horror of not wearing one is mentally impossible, so a halter neck was a tough decision. I wisely decided to stash my bra in my bag ( I love how the spell check keeps pointing out that I have made a spelling mistake and correct ‘bra in’ to ‘brain), in the instance that I got cold feet and needed to panic-bra up. Thinking back on it now the fact that it was such a decision is hilarious, but back then it was a real issue, OK?!

So I went to the security, and set off the machine. Not personally, but there was something in my bag that the team felt was too suspicious to pass. Yeah right, ritual humiliation must slightly brighten their days. So they searched my bag pulling out revision books and mp3 players, until the man pulled my bra out and held it in lofty elevation for the whole line to see.

It turned out that the reason I had set off the alarm was due to the tin pencil case I had brought along filled with pens to revise on the trip. My bra had just been an added extra for the amusement of the masses, and I think a part of me died that day.

Since this painful event, I have always made sure that there is absolutely nothing that can be deemed suspicious in my hand luggage. Tweezers, eyelash curlers, pennies, anything that may have an adverse reaction on the stern looking man at the security desk gets firmly put into my stow bag, and I can 100% say that absolutely no one has had a chance to interfere with my luggage.

Let bra-gate be a lesson to you all!!

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6 Responses to “Destination Unknown”

  1. James Houghton August 24, 2011 at 12:04 pm #

    I enjoyed this Airport-Bra related blog. This has inspired an airport blog of my own, when I get there later anyway.

    Not sure I’ll have bra issues, well not to the same extent anyway.

  2. prenin August 24, 2011 at 12:54 pm #

    Now THAT was sooo damned cruel!!! 😦

    Sorry you had to suffer for that hun, but he didn’t need to do that…

    Love and hugs!

    Prenin.

  3. Megan August 24, 2011 at 1:44 pm #

    While it must have been horrifying to have had that happen back then it sure made for a good laugh now! Too funny!

  4. jofranciszek August 24, 2011 at 6:03 pm #

    It is funny now 🙂 I hate the security check, it think it’s over the top really but I also like to be efficient with it. Never have any things that are setting the “gate on fire”, no belt, nothing in my pockets, no scarfs or jewelry, trekking shoes taken off and so. I hate people taking forever to cross the gate because they have all those things to take off or out

  5. nerdcristine August 26, 2011 at 6:18 pm #

    This is hilarious, and terrible, I think I would have just curled up into a ball and cried if this happened to me. At least it makes a good story. :]

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