Little Miss Accident Prone

13 Jul

I shouldn’t be allowed out of my room unsupervised.

Yesterday I felt under the weather and a little grumpy, so I went home fully intending to watch crime watch (which cheers me up*) and go to bed early. I stopped by the supermarket to get me some cold and flu medicine, and aimlessly wandered about, trying to navigate the maze of old people and their trollies, and buy something worthwhile.

You could tell I felt ill. I normally come out with at least one vegetable and some cheese related produce, but I bought only loo rolls, some new pillow cases, pesto, cosmo and some mini chicken kievs. I obviously wasn’t planning a culinary master class, so cooked the mini chicken kievs and put some chips on. that’s what I love about being single. If I want to eat guacamole with peppers for five nights on the trot for dinner, I can without someone saying “really? For the FIFTH NIGHT?” judge lest ye be judged and all that. On a similar note, if I want to eat cream cheese off a hula hoop, or dip Pringles in cream cheese, I can. As much as I want. Without talk of soup or a carrot, or “what are you having that’s actually in a food group?” cheese, hello?!

Anyway, so I cooked the little kievs and got distracted by taking all the lovely clean and dry washing out of the tumble dryer (whoever invented those things. I love you. My clothes always smell of magic and not of mould like they do in winter when you live in a flat and have no tumble dryer or outside space. all clothes get hung from curtain rails and dryers, and you smell like you fell in a pond). When I went back to them all the garlicky buttery goodness had oozed out, so defeated I put them on a plate. On went the TV (another rare thing) and I bit into one, a little distracted.

The next think I knew I was dancing round the room screaming “bastard!!!” at no one in particular, although the rabbit looked particularly affronted. This was a rogue mini kiev; still full of its burning filling, and it had gone off like a grenade. Wanting some sympathy, as my sympathetic housemates were out at the time, I text my mother and sister, and the responses were both the same.

“Were you eating dinner naked?!”

The long and short of it is that I now have a blister the size of a fifty pence right on my boob (that’s what you get for wearing a v neck top and eating without protection) and a blister on my chin. Which REALLY hurts and I keep knocking (putting makeup on this morning, fun times!).  Note to self. Eat only salad. It cannot harm you.

*I love crime watch. It cheers me up because although it’s all doom and gloom, murderers and rapists and unsolved mysteries, I like it when they catch the killers and scumbags. I get an elevated sense of faith in the general public, and it makes me feel warm and fuzzy. Yep, some psycho may have robbed someone’s nan for their pension money, but Kirsty and the team bang them up and sort them out. Much better!

9 Responses to “Little Miss Accident Prone”

  1. prenin July 13, 2011 at 1:15 pm #

    I microwaved a Pataks curry wrap one time.

    It was cold on the outside and mouth-stripping hot on the inside – I NEVER bought one ever again!!! 😦


    Love and squishy hugs!


  2. egills July 13, 2011 at 2:27 pm #

    Evil evil kiev – especially for picking on you when you’re already down!
    Hope you feel better soon.
    ( I always feel like cheese toasties when I’m feeling down and they have caused many a swear word when I forget to let them cool down ).

    • tinkerbelle86 July 13, 2011 at 2:42 pm #

      yep… never again. update is the blister on my chin kinda looks like i drew on my face with a brown marker, so ive sent my colleague out to get me some tiger balm. i reckon that outta fix it, as long as the skin isnt broken, else there will be more blue air hovering around me! it was definately worse than when you tread on the hair straightners, or on a plug that isnt plugged into the wall, and my face andbody bear the scars!!

  3. Bridgesburning Chris King July 13, 2011 at 3:22 pm #

    Now after a day like that they can only get better! Hope the burns heal quickly!

  4. July 13, 2011 at 3:42 pm #

    Oh goodness gracious. I laughed my way throughout this post. You have a rare gift young lady, to make people laugh through writing. v. nice. You language is colorful and fun. So cute. Am worried a bit ’bout your wounds. I’m sure they will heal. Looking forward to reading more.


  5. countingducks July 13, 2011 at 4:10 pm #

    My history is littered with catering disasters so I sympathise with you. I once splashed hot toffee ( I was making it badly) on my finger, shook my finger and flicked some onto my lip. That was another blister to remember

  6. granny1947 July 13, 2011 at 6:36 pm #

    Thanks for the smile….that is just the sort of thing I would do.
    Salad could have a lurking worm.
    Might not be dangerous but could be very yucky!

  7. Vix @ LittleMissEverything July 18, 2011 at 3:14 pm #

    Ouch that must have hurt! Eating bad stuff when you’re ill is like the law or something!

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