19 Jun

Most people think that runners are men; guys who panic that someone likes them too much, or that something is heading to be something that they are not comfortable with, or something that they are scared or, or something that they just plain don’t want. Runners are often associated with relationships, but I know runners who have been offered a promotion and then quit their job to travel the world, or panicked at the thought of buying a house, or a car.
But runners are more dangerous when they are women. Teem a runner with a stereotype and you are left with something volatile, like chemicals mixed together and the presence of a spark. Women are conditioned to think that we have to find a guy by a certain age, settle down and have a family, and that the time is ticking, and life will soon be over. Older generations talk about being left on the shelf, about missing the prime of our lives. “Don’t cut your hair short, men don’t like it. You’ll end up on your own!!”
My best friend in the world and I both have short hair. And we both are runners. Since teenagers we have run at the slightest of situations, and a decade later, we continue to run. If a situation seems slightly intense, too much like commitment, too much of a responsibility or too much like making a grown up decision, we bolt. Grab the running shoes and sprint for the hills! Maybe the way we experienced our teenage years negates this for us, but we are more likely to be found in a different country, in surroundings we feel more familiar in than one the front line, fighting, when things get tough. Don’t get me wrong, we have both had relationships lasting more than five years a piece, but at the same time we were young, and weren’t being told that our time was running out. Now we can’t think of anything worse that domestication and settling down. Ugh.
And you know what? We like it that way. Hand in hand, ready to jump and leave the battle, we don’t feel the need to fight. If something is easy and breezy we are happy to while away our time doing it, but faced with a decision or something that feels too adult, you find holes in the wall where we have bolted for freedom.
My strongest and most committed relationship is with my best friend; a sister than wasn’t born that way but a sister all the same. Give it a day, or a year, or a lifetime, we always resume just where we left off and she knows every facet of my personality and every character weakness I display. I might be volatile, temperamental and defensive, but she accepts me for my weaknesses and loves me all the same. I’ve heard it say that fall in love with a female runner and you have found a keeper which may be true, but that’s not something I can make any comment on. All I know is I have a friend who doesn’t judge me for who I am or what society says I should be, and that makes me luckier than most.

5 Responses to “Runners”

  1. mairedubhtx June 19, 2011 at 1:23 pm #

    You are so lucky to have someone who understands when you run. I run all the time and have no one who understands that I panic and run. People think you should be able to put your fears aside and just do thinks, but it isn’t that easy. It’s easier to run.

  2. Vixter2010 June 19, 2011 at 1:25 pm #

    I don’t think there’s a right way to do things anymore, just be yourself and live the way you want! You’re young, plenty of time to settle down if you want to one day.

    I also have short hair but am growing – it cos I want to, not to attract a man, hilarious people say men don’t like short hair – they should want you to be who you wanna be otherwise you wouldn’t want to attract them!

  3. Redneckprincess June 19, 2011 at 2:32 pm #

    Ahhh, my friend…life is for living, do it while you are young and CAN!!! I wish I had traveled while I was young and done all the things I dreamed of. Don’t get me wrong, I am so grateful for my life and the way I have lived it, but if I had a do over, I would have been all about me in my 20’s. You should be so proud that you have the courage to do whatever you want to do and what feels right for you … xoxoxoxo

  4. Melissa's Meanderings June 19, 2011 at 6:37 pm #

    It’s great to have the confidence to be yourself and a partner in crime who gets you!!

  5. prenin June 20, 2011 at 1:21 am #

    Live your life as you want to hun – I do!!!

    Love and squishy hugs!


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