A year ago I started a blog. I wasn’t sure how it would work or where it would go, and I knew I didn’t really want anyone to read it that I knew, for fear of criticism I suppose. I tentatively dipped my toe into the pool of my opinions and expressing them, and hoped that they would disappear into the abyss of the blog. My blog took me from reality and created an alter ego; removing me from the stressful anxiety of being in a place that I didn’t want to be in because I felt I should be. The release of being able to grab my laptop and go to a room where I could sit by myself with no football on the TV or need to clear up the mess of a less than tidy boyfriend was like a sanctuary, and the words flowed from the tips of my fingers like electricity. I loved it. I tentatively started posting the odd link to facebook and twitter, thinking that really people were too busy to click on a link that I had posted.
So did I really want to keep my voice quiet? A year on I’m really happy with the progress I have made and the blog friends I have acquired along the way. People that I might never talk to in my daily life have enriched my opinions, and I have seen the world from a new side.
Has it been successful? What is success? If you had told me that this time in a year I would have 150 active subscribers and over twenty thousand hits, I would have laughed. Yet I’ve been touched not only by the comments of people I don’t know, but the people who put a face to my name and who I know in the real world. At a friend’s birthday a few months ago a guy I went to school with came up to me and told me about how he read my blog and how good he thought it was. And it nearly brought a tear to my eye!
I’m now confident that what I write can be read, and that I have a voice in the world. So thanks to each and every one of you for giving me the confidence to become a little more controversial; to dig deep into things that I normally wouldn’t mention and to gain some catharsis. A problem shared often IS a problem halved, and with all of you reading, problems are splintered into tiny little fragments and blown into the wind.
Im not normally the sort of person that gushes or comes up with really emo comments or girly asides (the girls watched the notebook last night. I couldnt bring myself to do it but got shouted at when I popped into the lounge to get some communal maltesers to find them both sniffling. I asked if he was dead yet. Apparently it was the wrong thing to say!) but sometimes you just need to say thank you.
So thank you, and what a difference a year makes.
Please note: normal reading will resume tomorrow when Belle is returned from the spaceship 🙂