According to the Geordie, I am the master of being passive aggressive. As the ‘go to girl’ in the office, I get some ridiculous questions at times and I try my best to not lose the plot when people ask me things that they don’t really need to, as they could solve the problem by themselves by just using their eyes. I respond with a smile, although inside my head the little voice says “why the hell do I know if there are any post its? Did you use the last pack? How am I supposed to know you did? I’m not a fricking mind reader!!!” or “no, I’m not going out to get the milk. I have just as much to do as you and I always forget to claim it back on my expenses!!”
So when I send an email round to everyone, she sends me one back. It normally reads something like this…
If we could all take it in turns to empty the dishwasher that would be great, as everyone is using the stuff and it’s not our responsibility down here to always do it. Also if the dishwasher is fully of clean stuff please could you not just put your plate in the sink and leave it till someone else empties it? Or put the dirty plate in with the clean stuff? Its common sense.
Many thanks and fluffy kisses.
Well, sort of.
And I get an email back saying
“Read as the following…..
I’m getting really sick of cleaning up after you horrible bastards. I don’t have kids or a boyfriend for this reason; I cannot be bothered to act as a maid after an office full of smelly people who can’t be arsed to tidy up. If you can’t empty the sodding dishwasher then just don’t eat.
One day I will go mad and kill you all. And then you’ll see how annoyed I really am!
No one talk to me for the rest of the day.
Evil Laura downstairs who hates you all.”
At least there is someone in the office who listens to what I’m really trying to say!!!