The Ex Factor

2 Feb

So you’re all glammed up, have stopped in a bar with the girls and boys to have a few team drinks before hitting a club, and what happens? You walk slap bang into your ex. A person you haven’t seen in six months, and think won’t be a problem.

It always is.

Regardless of who finished with whom / how long you were together/what occurred, there is always some sort of feeling, right? Especially if they are with their new girlfriend, who they got together with surprisingly quickly for being so heartbroken (i know, miaow, yawn…)

So what do you do? You could choose to hide in a corner, being comforted by friends who say you are prettier, he had gained weight, look at his hair etc etc, or you can do what i did. Go and say hello.

The thought process was thus; I was born here, he wasn’t (drunk mentality, obviously!) i wasn’t, in my few glasses of wine state, going to be run out of town by someone just because they were there. of course i wasn’t. I am a strong, independent woman. Residing with a boy is just clearly not for me, especially someone who is nice and cannot stand up to my often wilful and sometimes downright ridiculous thought processes. Like going for a run in the middle of July and practically killing both of us.(think black widow, they eat their partners. Ha!) So i went over, made awkward conversation, and then felt sad for the rest of the night that despite me being the bigger person, we couldn’t still have that easy friendship we used to have, when it was he, me and Wendy, long before it was ‘us’.

I looked round ten minutes later, after being genuinely engrossed in a conversation with one of the lads, and he had left.

My advice is this: if you see them, go and say hi. Its not going to make you feel any worse, and you can adopt a demeanour of unbothered inner calm. And after all, we all aspire to that, don’t we?


2 Responses to “The Ex Factor”

  1. Julia Johansen February 2, 2011 at 2:41 pm #

    After a tumultuous history with exes, where I wished they would all just die in a fire, I have made friends with all my exes. I even went back and sent some emails 10 years later and took responsibility for my actions and apologized. I figured that at least I could remove some of the pain from my past.

    To be fair, it took me until I was almost 30 to come to this. At 24 if I saw an ex I would have hidden. 🙂

  2. tinkerbelle86 February 3, 2011 at 9:11 am #

    thanks Julia, after some recent incidents I would have to opt for the die in a fire preference. 🙂

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